Vigilance

Growing up, I gravitated toward danger. I don’t know if this is a boy thing or just a human thing, but nonetheless, it was one of the things that attracted my attention. I played sports in which inflicting violence on others was part of the game. Football isn’t football without punishing hits. Baseball isn’t necessarily violent, but I played catcher. I loved plays at the plate that involved a crash in order to protect home base. However, wrestling was the most violent sport I played, and it demanded everything from me.

My first sport was wrestling. This was not the type of wrestling you see on WWF. This was freestyle wrestling. The goal of wrestling is to pin the shoulders of your opponent to the mat for at least 3 seconds. My Dad, who was a state champion wrestler, taught me the moves that could punish me or help me win the match depending on who was using them…me or my opponent. Moves like, “The Arm Bar”, “The Cross Face,” “The Double Grapevine,” and “The Banana Split” communicate pain even if you don’t know what these moves are (trust me, you don’t want to be on the receiving end of these). All of these moves were created to make your opponents submit to you (or you to him).

Wrestling is a fully engaged sport. When facing an opponent you are pulled into a battle mentally, physically, and emotionally. At the weigh in, you stand next to your opponent, and you get the chance to size each other up. This pre-game weigh in was a complete mind game. There were many opponents I faced who came to the weigh in with their sweatshirt sleeves lined with safety pins from their shoulder to their wrist designating how many matches they had won by a pin. Then there was the match itself. Wrestling another man was one of the greatest physical tests I have ever faced. There was not a match in which I competed where I wasn’t completely exhausted at the finish. Every muscle in my body was used to exert my will on my opponent or counter my opponents will. Then after the match, I was either the victor or the loser, and I had to face the crowd to await the verdict by the referee (even if the verdict was clear). Wrestling had the power to either give me an inflated sense of self worth or strip every once of it I had.

Ultimately, wrestling taught me that I could not let my guard down…ever. The moment I let my guard down mentally, physically or emotionally, I was going to lose.

To be clear, it wasn’t the violence that attracted me to wrestling (or the other sports I played), it was the byproduct of facing that sport’s particular danger that really attracted me. The byproduct of the danger was the singular vision of vigilance mentally, physically, and emotionally that was drawn out in me as I faced the sport’s inherent danger.

As I have been reading through 2 Timothy with you, I have been reminded of the danger of following Christ. Mentally, physically, and emotionally we face danger all day long. Our Opponent is constantly using moves on us to submit us to his will. He seeks to weaken our vigilance to keep the sound teaching of the gospel, and to guard the good deposit that is in us. In reality, it doesn’t necessarily feel like I am in a battle. Right now, I am sitting in Panera having a cup of coffee writing this letter to you. I don’t feel particularly threatened. As a result, it is all too easy to let life happen to me, rather than to do the work of keeping and guarding in my faith. I basically let my Enemy work his moves on me all day long without countering them.

Last week, Paul’s words reminded me again to stay vigilant to living life that keeps the sound teaching that leads me to faith and love in Jesus. I was also reminded to be vigilant in guarding the good deposit of the gospel knowing that it is all to easy to live a life without grace at the center of it. When I let my guard down, the Enemy punishes me. His moves submit my thoughts, my actions, and my spirit to his will instead of the Lord’s will.

Pray with me that we would become aware of the moves that the Enemy seeks to put on us to submit us to his will. As a result, let us become vigilant to keep to the sound teaching that leads us to faith and love in Jesus, and to guard the good deposit so that our lives our lived with grace at the center of it.

Marching to a Different Beat

Have you ever had one of those weeks where you just couldn’t catch up? (grad students are never caught up, so at least you feel me). This week, I have especially felt the pressure of time slipping by too quickly. No matter how hard I have worked, the “to-do” piles don’t seem to decrease. For some reason I have been bothered by not being able to accomplish all that I hope to accomplish. I have felt…well, grumpy about the whole matter. As a result, I have had a hard time sleeping, I have not felt like playing with the kids, and the time I have spent with others has felt rushed all because there are more important things to do that occupy my brain activity

This past weekend, I led the Turbo Group Training for those that will be serving as mentors for those in the Turbo Groups. It was another thing added to my already packed schedule, but helping people mentor others well is something that I am passionate about. So, I agreed to serve. During the course of the training we were looking at Gen. 1, and someone made the comment that God didn’t create the world in one day. He took six days, and then rested on the seventh before doing anything more. At the time, I thought it was one of the more obvious observations of the chapter and didn’t think much of it. However, as my week has progressed, that comment has begun to take root in my life.

Knowing God could have created everything in an instant, but didn’t, reflects something about God. He somehow was not concerned with the rate at which things got done. There is an honor in his work that recognizes when enough is enough. I then remembered that at the end of each day, God proclaimed, “It was good.” This simple act of creating, stopping, and deeming it good has been instructive to me…because it is not how I live.

The simple comment that God didn’t create the world in one day has walked with me this week. As a result, I am trying to learn how to do my work of creating in time, not outside of it. When the day is done, I am learning to stop and call the day good. This rhythm is shaping my life, albeit slowly, as I focus less on what I have accomplished, and more on the gift of being able to join God’s work of creating…in time.

Getting out of sync with God’s rhythm in my life has proven to dishonor my work and the people in my life. Pray with me that we would be a community that learns to follow God’s lead as we think about our work and relationships. May we learn not to rush God’s work in our own lives, expecting him to work in our time frame. May we learn to release our expectations of others that serve to dishonor our friends and family. Instead, pray with me that we would learn to create, stop, and bless in the rhythm God has invited us into.

Today, I Saw Jesus

After finishing lunch at Bear Rock at University Mall, and I had some time to kill before my next meeting. There was a cozy spot open in front of their faux fireplace, so I thought I would save some fossil fuel by staying put. I whipped out my laptop to catch up on my online communication. Thirty minutes later, I looked up from my screen to give my eyes a break from looking at my screen, and the next thing my eyes saw was Jesus.

There he was, or I should say there she was, leading a group of people into Bear Rock for a lunch on the other side of the cozy faux fireplace (it is of the see through variety). This young woman was leading a group of mentally challenged men and women to have lunch with her. They walked rather slowly, but their eyes were fixed on her. The woman who was right behind…Jesus…was holding tightly to her arm. There was no way she was letting go. Then, this woman, who just had to be Jesus, patiently held the door for the rest of her friends to walk through and helped them to their place in front of the fireplace.

After this, she reached into her bag and pulled out some $20’s, and handed one to each person in her party. They then got menus to select their meal, and proceeded to the cashier to order and pay for their meals. After that, they made their way back to their seats in front of the fireplace. Quietly, without much fanfare, they ate together with…with Jesus.

Ok, maybe this woman wasn’t Jesus, but when I saw this gentle crowd come in led by this woman, that’s all I could think of. I was struck with the picture that was being played out in front of me. I thought, “This is the picture of Jesus leading the body of Christ.” Here he was leading a band of broken people together to share a fellowship meal with him. He accepts our company (no matter what our challenges). He leads us to quiet waters (or warm fireplaces). He gives us provision ($20 bucks for lunch). He restores our souls (transforming who we are by his presence with us).

As I think about our community, pray with me that we would hold on to Jesus like that woman at the front of the line...not worried or anxious about our liabilities, but joyful because of God’s presence with us.